::[ kampungkai ]::

Thursday, April 21

Home Alone with Daddy

*sweats...fuhh, finally i'm home. Just got back from my aunty's place in Sri Damansara. Woke up kinda early this morning at 8:30am, and sent my mum there. The drive was smooth all along the journey except a lil stretch in cheras, an unavoidable jam that is there 18 hours a day.

It was a boring trip. Why? cos my mum will be mouth fighting with her sister, and my cousin who is 22 years elder than me, will also join them in mouth fighting. Leaving me all alone in the living room peacefully, away from all the noise pollution. I prefer to lie on the floor whenever i visit their house, cos the black leather sofa warms up very quickly under my butt, and it makes my butt sweat! hahaha! So, i'll be on the floor, with the 'stolen' lil MAS pillow under my head, watching ASTRO, particularly channel 11 - food & travel. Luv the shows! All the chefs make cooking as though it's so easy. Cut here cut there, chop chop chop, and throw inside the Kuali. 5 mins later, done! Darn, it makes my saliva drip as it looks really tasty and mouth watering. To my interest, there was this show about a chef, the title of his show is called "NEVER TRUST A SKINNY CHEF" ahhahahhaha! It's so true, i agree with him! Apparently, he said that chefs who are skinny are not chefs, they dun eat and taste enough food, so no quality. Keep it up FAT CHEF!!

After lunch, me-mum-cousin-aunty went to THE CURVE jalan-jalan. It's a new mall, just beside IKANO, TESCO and IKEA. Kinda empty, maybe cos it's new, and i dun see any shopperholics with bags on their left&right hand, nor their neck or legs! hahaha.... IKANO was much crowded than THE CURVE, even though both malls were interconnected by a bridge. Ppl of all ages could be seen loitering around. And i walked pass "APPLE SHOP", but i couldn't enter! cos the other 3 aunties were not technology minded! arghhhh wanted to check out the iPOD, but only had a glance of it through the window. *sob sob...

After getting some groceries from TESCO, we headed back to my aunty's house. And me was back to lying on the small MAS pillow, watching ASTRO (my house dun have ASTRO, that's y i watch it whenever i'm in her house). At 5pm, i headed back to Kajang alone.

Tonite, i'll be Home Alone with Daddy. Mum will be staying at Aunty's place till Sunday. Well she's kinda free cos she has retired. My brother is currently on a fishing boat trip somewhere near P.Tioman, doing deep sea fishing (hope he doesn't get a Dugong back hahah!), and will onlybe back in a week or so. However from tomorrow morning onwards, I'll be Home Alone with Myself! dad is going to Kota Bharu to work, driving all the way for 8-10 hours, pity him! Just wonder why there's no highway from Kuantan to Kota Bharu, it would make life alot more easier and travel time shorter. Hope i could just fly him there, that would be much faster and least tiring.

*just went and open the door for dad, he went jogging

Aiyorrrrrrrrrr..... he tapao-ed dinner! i have alraedy taken out the leftovers to warm up and eat, but he tapao, duh! my dad really is really weird, he would definitely bring us out to eat or tapao whenever mum is not around, not even a single thought of consuming leftovers! hahaha... daddy daddy. btw, it's a secret between his children and him, we won't tell mum that we ate out and didn't eat her food (kekekek shhhhh)

hm... any idea what i can do for tonite? and also the other days till Sunday?

*Jason, if u are reading this, please dun tempt me to go Melaka
*k la k la, any1 interested to go Melaka? tell me, then we'll go.

Wednesday, April 20

Effect of NesLo

I'm home I'm home! Tomorrow Holiday! yeay! Friday, Saturday & Sunday holiday too! Yeay! 1, 2, 3, 4. 4 days holiday! hahaha...What a short week in MIAT. The night i stepped foot in MIAT, i was already looking forward for today, sitting infront on my own PC, eating a cold apple while online. The feeling of being released from jail is just....just... just too good to be true!!! Yea, i call MIAT a jail, cos i'm forced to stay in the hostel during school days. At least at home, there won't be any guards who'll be nagging away if i come back after 10pm, and at least i can go out after 10pm if compared to the stupid rules and regulations set by MIAT. That's a place i call -----> HELL. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . (all these . . . . . . . dots are blood, hell has lots of blood hor? hahahha)

Didn't blog yesterday cos i was too tired to even walk to the library to online, for i had only slept for 8 hours in 3 days. I'm a light sleeper when it comes to work. And during the last 2 nights i have been doing my revision and homework till the wee hours of the day, sacrificing my sleeping hours, for the sake of everyone's safety in the future(chaeeeewahhhh hahahha) Well, didn't know why i was so hardworking and dedicated for 2 nights. Maybe it was because of the topics that interest me, it was about GPS-Global Positioning System, Fly-By-Wire, and lightings of an aircraft.

Wondering how i managed to tahan 3 days with only 8hours of sleep? the secret is, a cup of hot NESLO. Mix the 3in1 packet of Nescafe and add 2-3 tea spoons of Milo, and u'll get a magic drink. The aroma will put a big ring to your nose like what a cow has(ouch!) and pull u to the drink, making sure that u have a sip of the 'kaokao' potion hahaha...my nose hurts! i remembered, even after drinking my Neslo at midnight, i felt so sleepy, so i went to bed. To my surprise, instead of cuddling comfortably in my comforter, i was turning from left to right, right to left, chest facing up to back facing up, legs facing east to legs facing west, extra pillow on the head to below head. arghh! i just got more and more alert and i couldn't even close my eyes! *@(#$%^)@# turned on table lamp, started studying.

Here are 3 beautiful pics of coffee i took a year ago in a hotel. nice?
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1. Black coffee

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2. Pouring fresh milk into Black coffee

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3. Tadaaa! Coffee.....

I seldom drink coffee for i wanna keep it as a magic drink when i need them, especially during exam week or when i'm in the mood to revise. I'm sure some of you are immuned to caffeine even though drinking coffee or tea 10 minutes b4 sleep. I used to be like that, but i soon discovered that i couldn't produce anymore magic drinks when i needed them most.hahaha! (i'm not a magician like Harry Potter) Even with 2 bottles of red bull(kononnya makes ppl alert), i slept like a baby. (wasted my money and it doesn't taste good, NesLo still the best haha!)

On the 1st night, i studied till 4am, my eyes felt dry and tired, so i went to bed. Unfortunately, i was still turning left to right, right to left and the list goes on............. since then, i understood my body a lil more better. I learnt that i whenever i had NesLo, i will stay up for 5 hours, and so finally i dozed off at 5am. (i think so it's 5am, cos the last time i saw the time on my hp was 4:50). However, the peaceful and comfy sleep finished a lil too fast. Just a mere 2 hours and 20 minutes later(7:20am), I had to wake up at for class, SIGH!!!

As for tonite, dun think i'll be re-charging my battery so soon cos I'm back HOME! I guess every1's the same, whenever we r back from studies for the 1st day, we'll stay up til as late as possible no matter how tired we felt while still in college/U. Tonite yamcha, wuuhoooo! any1 wanna follow? no more NESLO for tonite!

Monday, April 18

Forgetful Me

On my way to MIAT last night, I found out that i forgotten to bring along my 'PowerPlant' text book and an assignment paper that needed to be handed in today. Sigh, i didn't dare voice out to my dad who was driving to turn back, else i would get sounding. So, i decided to ask around friends, whether any1 would be kind enough to lend me a car or bike.

To my rescue, my roommate drove his car to MIAT today. He reached at 7:30am, and i had to fore myself to wake up to ask for his permission.(my class was at 11) It was hard to actually open my eyes at 7:30, if compared to my normal waking up time at noon. What to do? I'm just so forgetful.

5 mins later, i managed to drag myself out from the comforter, reluctantly wore on a shirt and styled my sleepy hair with my hands. Done, ready to go. Not even washing my face 1st or brushing my teeth (i'm just so gross). So i got in the car, started the engine, rubbed my eyes again, passed the guards, and drove for 10 minute.

And suddenly i felt so awake! total adrenaline rush! eyes bigbig, heart dupdap dupdap!............... I left my house keys back in my hostel room.(no1 was at home, so i had to bring my own keys) sighhhhh, why am i just so forgetful! I made a U-turn, drove another 10 minutes back to hostel, ran up the stairs, opened my cupboard and grabbed the housekeyes. My roommate looked at me without saying a word, but i could read what was running in his head. He was saying "stupid" hahahh!

took a 30 mins drive home, had a nice hot water bath til the whole bathroom was filled with steam, brushed my teeth and took whatever that i forgotten to bring, including 2 new rolls of toilet paper, hahah! Then, I drove to town and tapao-ed zu chang fen(in mandarin) for my roommate to say thank you, and drove another 30 minutes back to hostel. Now i'm feeling so tired for the lack of sleep.

5 minutes ago, b4 posting this, i just found out that the assigment has to be handed in by tomorrow, not today. *(@#&()*)*($&*_@#*(&@#*( arghhhhh, y treat me like that? i could have slept till 11 and gone home to take the things in the evening. I guess u all have experienced such situation b4 in your life? gonna get my lunch now, so hungry!

Sunday, April 17

Pathetic Robbers

Gonna head back to MIAT-Malaysian Institute of Aviation Technology in an hour or so after dinner. I never liked Sundays, it's the day where i'll wake up knowing that I've to go back to hostel in the evening, looking at the clock counting how many hours more b4 going back, and knowing that i have to suffer another torturous week in MIAT, both mentally and physically.

It makes things worst when i recall about things happening in MIAT. i'm talking bout BREAK INS. Believe me, after reading this, you'll be either shaking your head or laughing like a mad cow or maybe BOTH? Here's what i'm gonna tell u today...

MIAT is situated in a very kampung area, surrounded by pokok kelapa sawit and hutan belantara. It's somewhere near KLIA, bout 15 minutes drive. erm...beside ELITE highway, before KLIA toll plaza, Left Hand Side if u come from KL-SRBN highway direction. Try and look for it next time while driving, u'll see a big hanger. That's MIAT, a place with lots weird monkeys (as in humans) and uncivilsed monkeys(humans also).

So, my hostel room has 2 doors. 1 is locked, with a cupboard blocking it because we re-arranged the room(safe space and also because that door has no key), and the other is used for going in and out. Too bad for me and roommates, this door's knob is spoilt, therefore cannot be locked. Knowing that it cannot be locked and all of us will not be around during class and weekends, we don't keep valuable things in the room, only leaving table lamps, books, papers, stationeries, can food and cheap cheap stuffs back.

1 fine sunday night a few weeks back, when me and Eric(roommate) reached the room together, we sighed together, because it's a whole new week to go through again. He turned on the lights and fan, everything was at it's place like when we left it. Unpacked out stuffs and mop the room. After everything done, we took out our towel and wanted to bathe.

- Eric was searching for something, while i was waiting for him at the door

Eric : Chris, u got toilet paper ar? i dunno where i put mine.
Me : got, wait ar...

- Opened my cupboard, searched for my toilet paper

Me : yeee? where's my 2 rolls of toilet paper ar? not here wan?
Eric : hmmm..... ei? the roll inside the tin also lost!
* it's a like milo tin with cover

- both of us started smiling at each other and laughed

U get what i'm trying to say? There was a break in! in our room! and our toilet papers were robbed! not pieces, but rolls! what the heck! Eric lost 1 new roll and 1 half-used roll, and I lost 2 new rolls and 1 half-used roll, all in 3 new rolls and 2 half-used rolls. Man.. ain't that pathetic? I think i'm gonna hold a donation drive on toilet paper, will u guys and girls be kind enough to donate some of yours to me? so that i can put them INSIDE my room for 'monkeys' to take?! pleaseeeeeeeeeee?

Then i found out that my syillings on my table was gone. OK fine, that's my fault, shouldn't have left coins on the table, few bucks gone.fine fine fine! toilet paper gone nvm, syillings gonen vm, so we continued on going to the bathroom. As i was wearing my slippers...

Me : Eric, you put your slipper inside the room issit?
Eric : No ar...
Me & Eric : hahahahahhahhaha!

U get what i'm trying to say AGAIN? There was another break in! in our room! and this time Eric's slipper was robbed! (sounds better than stolen, hehe) What the heck! It wasn't even a branded BATA slipper, but an old japanese-type slipper which i hated so much cos it's so noisy when he walks. Now... u tell me, is this pathetic too? Last semester i lost my BATA slippers which cost RM30, knowing that this place is not safe, now i wear an old 1 that u won't even feel like putting your feet into it. But Eric's slipper wasn't clean either!

Alright! toilet paper gone nvm, coins gone nvm, slipper gone nvm. We bathed and slept peacefully. Next morning as we were preparing for class, dressing up in uniform, packing books into bag, Eric was making coffee. He poured coffee powder into his cup and added hot water. Then...

Eric : Chris, did u see my sugar?
Me : Isn't it on the table, in the tupperware?
Eric : Oh no no, not that 1, i mean the packet sugar, like hotel's type
Me : it's on the table wat, dun have?
Eric : dun have...
Me & Eric : hahahhahhahhahhah!

Sighh... i think u know what happen. --->Sugar stolen. Not the tupperware of sugar, but the whole plastic bag of small packets of sugar. So, in 1 weekend, we were robbed, we treasured out live, we told them not to harm us, and gave them watever they wanted. Toilet paper, coins, slipper and sugar. Thank God i'm ALIVE. hahaha.. and in 30 minutes time, i'm going back to this pathetic place. I still wonder who did it. Was it the students? Or was it the cleaners? Can u figure it out for me? Hopefully, nothing is stolen this time. Byebye everyone.

Saturday, April 16

J.Ds, Bacardi Limon, Tequila Pop [Part-II]


The following night we were back at the mansion to finish up the bottle, with an addition to half a bottle of bacardi limon. while preparing to open the bottle, A's father walked pass and took up the J.D bottle...

A's father : what's this, Jack Daniel's old whiskey, 40%, made in United States...
A : yea, bought from KLIA, RM88
A's father : hahahah RM88 only ar? what's this old whiskey, i think it's cheap whiskey la

*shakes head and laugh in a sarcastic manner

@*&$*(@&;# !!! ishhhhhh.... and we started laughing and A had nothing to say but to accept the fact that he was 'zha' by his dad. what a joker! the same goes to the bacardi bottle. Dup! (homer simpson's sound)
As we were trying out to pop the JD with Coke, and the bacardi with sprite, A's mother came walking by.

A's mother : eh, what u all doing?
A : Pop! make cocktail.
A's mother : haiyaaarrr.. how can pop using this, can only use tequila!
*she points to the cupboard
*we actually knew that tequila is the correct liquor for popping, but thought of finishing up the JD, so...
And so open bottle! *clap clap clap... A's mum thought us the correct way. She sliced the lemon into chunks and brought out a small bowl of fine salt. She seemed so experience as she does it, guiding us step by step.

1. put ice cubes into the cup (she said 3 cubes is enough)
2. dip the chunk of lemon in salt, and stain it on the mouth of the cup (so the mouth has a salty and soury taste)
3. pour in 1/4 to 1/2 inch of tequila, add a ratio of 1:3 tequila to coke
4. put the coaster over, Pop it hard
5. drink straight down till bottom's up
*additional note : turn the glass while gulping to taste the salty and soury flavourthere goes. Experienced, ain't she?

Try this out, kinda fun! believe me, it really taste good and it's nice to drink. But dun end up like us after that, we got so blur, but not drunk yet! 4 of us finished the bottle of 40% alcohol, and was challenging each other to walk in a straight line (follow the line in between tiles on the floor). We all passed! so it means we were not drunk, just blur. yeayyy! changed venue again, leaving the wet and dirty bar (splashes from the pop everywhere) to the living room.

Our head felt so heavy that once we didn't sit straight, we would just fall to the side, totally have no control of ourselves at all. Not to forget, we were again like monkey's arse - RED. after cooling down, we went and make some chinese tea to counter attack the liquor in our body. The walk from the living room to the kitchen was tedious, walking such a distance in the mansion and our heads were as heavy as washing machines, wasn't an easy job. Come to think of it, our head really resembled the washing machine, firstly it's heavy, secondly it's spinning the same way too! hahahha... and our mouth is the place where u pour detergent, and the water disposal tube is our ..... =)

Wow, what a wonderful night. This time i left A's house at 4am rather than 6am. Wanna beat my parents b4 they wake up. But of course, i was concious when i drove home, alcohol effect gone. Remember ar u guys and gals out there, please dun drink and drive alright? chill around 1st, have a drink, dun compromise your life, appreciate it k? So i reached home 20 mins later and had a really nice sleep till noon.

Mum : where u went har last nite?! so late still dunwan sleep! become ghost d issit?!!!

SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhh....................told u i'm a good boy...

Friday, April 15

J.Ds, Bacardi Limon, Tequila Pop [Part-I]

"I'm a good boy. I know it!"

This afternoon, when mum came back from school, i greeted her, helped her take her bag in and asked "how's today's teaching?". Uh, i'm just so caring ya? U see, I just woke up 10 minutes b4 she reached home (1pm), and she hates it when I wake up very late, she'll be asking me what i did the whole night? "what u did last night har?! so late also dunwan to sleep?! Become ghost d issit?!" (In hakka dialague) kekeke... mum-->funny-->mum hihihi... Anyway, she didn't know bout today, else she would be scolding me until i turn into a ghost. I'm so glad that she's teaching in the morning session recently, then i can sleep till the sun is direcetly above me. (she has retired btw, just go back to ganti teachers when they are on leave, like class ganti). However, on days that she doesn't teach, i have to wake up around 8-9am, even though i ghost around til 5am. Just to avoid nagging and scolding and act as though i'm a good boy who sleeps early wake up early. But i would be sleeping on the couch when she reads papers.

who said he's a good boy? *coughs... bullshit

Last friday night, me and 3 other bachelor buddies got together for a chat and drink. We've not met for quite some time as everyone was busy with studies and stuffs. I shall name them A, B and C. Gathering was at A's house. It was and still is always at A's house, cos his mansion is large enough for us to run around, which indirectly trains our cardio haha... Here are some pics of the ground floor of the 3-storey mansion.(these pics were not taken on that day, but more than a year back)

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Not living room, but 'welcome hall'

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Me at where we were popping, dining room behind

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Dining room

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Guest room, nice?

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Me at waterfall, in the garden

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Side of house

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Luxurious staircase (schoolmate)

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Me and Best Friend...

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Me and another Best Friend...

Large eh? that's y we like hanging out in his house, got a/c also, comfy! So 'A' bought a bottle of Jack Daniels (J.D) old whiskey from KLIA for RM88. Opened bottle, 4 coasters & 4 glasses with ice. Poured poured poured poured. Wanted to start off slow, so we added coke to soften the drink. Hm... after adding the coke, it didnt really taste like liquor, but more to coke with a touch of J.D. So we were taking it easy, drinking like plain water. Sips after sips, cups after cups, after around 10 minutes, half the bottle was gone. That was quite fast for amatures like us. We felt ok and was alert until 5 minutes later when we started to blush and turned into red monkey's arse. Hot Hot Hot... face was steaming, i guess the gassy coke stimulated the absorption rate? (that's what i heard from experienced drinkers later on)

Decided to stop drinking and cool down, put aside the bottle, and started chatting, talking bout life, this and that. It's nice to get together with friends once a while, talk and laugh, somehow it releases stress and u feel better after the outing. 'C' excused himself to go to the toilet during the conversation, none of us noticed, maybe cos our reflexes slowed down from the liquor effect (lagging). nvm, continued chatting...

- 'C' walked out from the bathroom back to the table.- stood in front of us, motionless for 10 secs, like a kayu.

C : " i fell down in the bathroom, see, my shirt is wet"

- all of us stopped talking and looked at him.

Me : " har?"

A : " what?"

B : "___" stares...*

we were so blur that we were still processing what he just said, really lagging la! hahahah....

C : " i fell down in the bathroom and my shirt is wet"

After the second attempt to explain, then we got what he wanted to say. We started laughing and laughing like mad cows, banging our head and hands on the table, and continued laughing for at least a minute till we felt so exhausted laughing, lack of stamina la. So what actually happend in the toilet is... (from what he said, dunno got cover up not, maybe he felt shy so didn't disclose some sensitive parts LOL) ...he was standing right in front of the toilet bowl (squatting type) peeing, (hm.. i wonder whether he aimed his chrysanthemum tea accurately into the hole not?) then after peeing, he attempted to bend down and reach for the hose to spray (ok, confirm didn't aim properly, that's y need to spray the side of the toilet bowl, ahhahahha!) and dunno how on earth he slipped and fell on the wet floor.

C : " when i bend down, i think too much blood flowed to my head, then suddenly i black out and fell to the side."

hahahaaha... we started laughing again like super duper mad cows! I know that we are suppose to be caring and ask him if he's alright, or whether he's injured, but then, we just couldn't help it but to laugh and laugh and laugh! haha in the end we forgotten bout it, he sat down and we continued chatting.after about half hour, we all felt even worst. blur. changed venue to the living room. C starting playing the play station2, amazing! he could still use his brain. respect respect. We hang around until 6am, and it was time for me to go home, fearing that my parents will wake up by the time i reach home. So i sent 'C' home and rushed back. To my surprise after i click on the auto-gate, it opened and there was it...my mum was doing her warm-up b4 her walk, and dad was wearing shoes, preparing to go to work. "shit" i'm doomed. They said nothing, and i explained that i overslept in friend's house. Done....hopeless kid.

Now who AGAIN said that he is a good boy? *coughs coughs... bullshit

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BOOM! in return for reading my blog haha!

to be continued...

Thursday, April 14

Seduced by Female Doctor

* ...Continued

After the urine test, i waited for the next test. There were 2 other guys with me (who are now my roommates).
After around 10 minutes, it was my turn. "Chen Yow Jong.... Mari!" Obediently I walked towards the nurse who was at the other end of the waiting room. "Berdiri belakang garis ni ya!" Obediently I stood behind the line. Now I was facing a white wall which was around 10-15 foot away. The Nurse then hung a small board with lots of alphabets on the wall. Then only i figured it out, it was the 'eye test'. As usual, the alphabet at the highest part is the largest, and the row right at the bottom is the smallest. Within a few seconds, i read out all perfectly! yeayy! (I've sharp eyes! eksyen eksyen abit)

Next was weight and height measurement, followed by ears test.

And back to waiting at the waiting room.

Had a number in my hand this time. Waiting for my turn to see Doctor. It would be the final stage, Doctor could fail my medical check-up if he/she thinks i'm ugly, and i wouldn't be fit to join MAS' aircraft engineers. (sob sob) Thus, i was nervous.... (i'm not handsome, what to do?)

*ting! tong! #123 ROOM 5

Walked gracefully pass all the others who were sitted, like bergaya only me in my BONIA long-sleeve and tie. hahaha... Well here's the main topic that i wanna blog bout today, enjoy.

*knock knock knock! ("come in")
*smiles =) (oh it's a she, an indian doctor)

Doctor : " Hi, have a sit"
Me : " Good Morning" *smiling all the way
Doctor : " How are u feeling today?" *smiles
Me : " mmm... abit nervous and tired, cos i rushed back from melaka for this."
Doctor : " i see... well, just relax and calm yourself, it's alright to be a lil nervous. We'll be done in no time." *smiles

- silence for a minute or two while l relaxed and calmed myself.
- she opened my file, took out some papers
- picks up a pen and laid the papers in order

Doctor : " Alright, we'll have to go through some paper work here, all u need to do is to answer me 'yes' or 'no'."
Me : " Oh ok."
Doctor : " Do u have AIDS?"
Me : " HAHAHA...nooo"

- what question is this!?

Doctor : " Do u have TIBI?"
Me : " HAHA...nooooooo"

- what? another weird question?!

Doctor : " Do u have eating problems? bulimic or aneroxic?
Me : " HAHA... nooooo, definitely no"

- ok, what is this! why all the weird weird questions wan?
- and the list of weird weird questions went on and on, it was as long as 2 A4 size papers
- there were Qs like 'do u have multiple sex partners' & 'any problems when urinating' (oh mine was flowing smoothly!)
- i was laughing and smiling all the way while answering NO to all of them
- i think it's part of the procedure la, so i accepted it la...

Doctor : " Do u have menstrual problems?"

- hahahhahha! kidding laaaa.... she didn't ask me that! I just saw this part on the paper accidentally.
- no offense to all our beloved females ya! forgive me...
- paper work finished.

Doctor : " Do u smoke?"
Me : " no, no i don't. I'm against smoking."
Doctor : " U better not smoke alright? It's really bad for your health."
Me : " yea sure, i really hate it, seriously hate it"

- no offense to all bros & sis smokers, i said that just to please her and act as a good good boy. *smart*

Doctor : " I'm the leading head of the anti-smoking something something in Selangor, have to curb this problem, more and more youngsters are smoking. I make sure my kids do not smoke. There are far more better things to do than smoking!"
Me : " Oh ok."

- OK. She's someone big. dun play play.
- So i changed into a serious look and stopped smiling. Oh, she has kids ~loving mother~

*** Seducing STARTS ***

Doctor : " k, i need to check your blood pressure now."
Me : " Oh ok"

- Unbuttoned my right sleeve, and started folding up layer by layer
- Just as i folded up till elbow level, revealing my fore arm...

Doctor : " Wowwww, do u body build? You have big arms!" *she looked at my right forearm while my left hand was still folding
Me : " hehehe... ya abit abit. I work out in the gym back in melaka"
Doctor : * Smilesssss.......

- eeeeee, how come she ask like that wan? weird.
- nvm, continued folding, so that the strap of the blood pressure equipment fitted my upper arm
- finished folding, reached the max, cant go higher anymore, revealing my BICEPS on her table

Doctor : " Wowwww, U have very big muscles! U take heavy weights?" *she asked with eyebrows lifted
Me : " hehehehhee......abit abit la"

- At that moment, i started to feel really really awkward!!!
- OH MY GOD, yerrrrrrrrrr.....why is she asking me such things!!!
- very very the geli laaa ~shivers~ she's a mother with kids already man, if she was a young 20+ lady, i understand la, but then! yerrrrrrrrrrr, u get what i mean?
- i raised my eyebrows too, questioning myself... "what the heck is happening now?"

- she strapped the thing around my arm
- pump pump pump.... waited..... pssssttttttttttttttttt, let go off the air and took off her stetoscope
- raised eyebrows....

Doctor : " Your heart beat is quite fast. Are u nervous?"
Me : " I think so?"

- WTFFFFF! of course nervous la! in fact, terrified!
- she asked me so geli questions, definitely i scared laaaa!
- walauuuu if my heart beat doesn't beat faster, sure i got problem d.

Doctor : " cool down, relax... I'll check it again few minutes later."
Me : " ok."

- trying really hard to chill.... looking around the room and table.
- then i did another blood pressure check, still the same..... fast heart beat
- was it because when i was chilling, i saw some surgery instruments on the trolley? knifes and sciccors?
- in the end, she tick the box and pass me. YEAY!

Doctor : " Next time dun be so nervous ok? learn to be cool, take a few deep breaths"
Me : " Next time u dun say my muscles big la.. i shy shy wan leh" (hahahaha! of course i didn't say that!)
Doctor : " k, I need you to take off your shirt and lie down on the bed" (it was on the other side of her room, beside the wall, oppposite her desk)

- Obediently, i listened to her. hahaha like she was dominating me. "STRIP! LIE DOWN NOW!"
- My back facing her, front facing the bed.
- I untied my tie, unfolded my right sleeve, unbuttoned my left sleeve, unbottoned whatever button on the shirt
- My pants was still on. hihi...

- I took off my shirt. My back still facing her
- I turned to place my shirt and tie on the petient's chair, so that it won't be crumpled
- Now i was facing her... and...

Doctor : " Wowwww, you are really big and muscular ehh?" *nodding her head

- F***! now obviously there's something wrong here!
- 1st my forearm, then my biceps, now my upper body? helppppppp...... =(
- WHAT IS GOING ON!!!! she's freakin me out now...
- that's not the end of the story, read on!

- continued smiling.
- laid down on the bed, both hands on my belt. (near to sibling, can protect if anything abrupt happens)
- she came over in her white jacket.

Doctor : " Can u sit up straight?"
Me : " yea sure."

- puts on her stestoscope.
- *heart beat sound.....dup dap! dup dap! dup dap!...................... tutttttttttttttttttttttttttt (hahah no la, still dup dap!)
- wahhhh the flat metal end of the stetosope damn cold man! it's metal rite? some more in air con room!

Doctor : " ok, lie down"

- continues pressing that piece of cold metal on my body. ah! ah! ah! cold laaa!
- luckily it's not hot wax instead. ouch! hehehheeh...
- here's the best part, and her next action satisfied her curiousity, i think?

- As she presses the stetoscope on my chest part...

Doctor : " wowww, very toughhhhhh eh?"

- *(&@#)(^@(^@ ?????????
- Continues pressing a few more time around the heart (but still on the left chest)
- I could feel that she was pressing abit harder this time, why the f*** did she do that!?
- was it because chest muscle too thick, cannot hear my heart beat? (DETT! wrong answer!)
- was it because chest muscle too thick and attractive, she wanted to feel it? (DING! U R RIGHT!)
- ahhhhh press harder, press harder... ahhhh! (hahahahahha *can't stop laughing hahahha)

I couldn't do anything, but just lied down there and let her feel me (damn!). The stetoscope and bed thing ended eventually, and i wore back my clothes, just like after some 'real actions' hahhaha... slowly, i button up 1 by 1, tug in my shirt, but kept my tie in the pocket this time. saw her closing my file.

Doctor : " U r done. Welcome to MAS"
Me : " oh.. thank you doctor." *smilesssssssssssssss =) yeay yeay!

- did i really get through the medical check up?
- or did i sacrifice my body for it? hahahhahha!

Doctor : " have a nice day!"
Me : " same to u."

I opened the door, closed softly. and said "F***" softly and laughed my way out... man, what a memorable day. See, even after 9 months i still remember every single word she said. I WAS SEDUCED BY A FEMALE DOCTOR!!! but thank god i wasn't seduced by a MALE doctor? vomits....

On the same day, i had to rush back to melaka for a midterm test which was at 8pm. Thank God i reached at 7:30pm, still could make it. But unThank God cos i didn't study that subject at all. Thank God again it was 80 objective questions, and thanx to hwayinn who let me copy her answer. I had a neck strain after the exam, stretched too much. kekeke...

How's the story? never got seduced b4 leh? envy me not? wahhaha.... =P

Wednesday, April 13

Chrysanthemum tea, tasty?

Finally, my boring class has finished. The class was about the flight deck, where all the controls and switches and super duper lot of complicatd things are located. (use to be known as COCKPIT, somehow because the word 'cock' was a sensitive word, they changed it) It wouldn't be that boring if it was not this particular lecturer teaching the subject. He mumbles just as jason does (*he's gonna kick my arse), and no 1 in the class listens to him. We will be doing our own revision, drawing stick man on the table...... and the 2 girls will be polishing their finger nails with that polishing stick (if u get what i mean, it's like a big ice cream stick). I looked at the 2 of them and respect! POWER laa.... polishing nails in an aviation school's classrooom.

While i was day dreaming and drawing 2 stickman with swords in class, i had a flash back of my medical check-up conducted by MAS' doctors b4 recruiting me. It was 9 months back in June 2004. Couldn't remember the date, but it was a Thursday while i was in MMU, Melaka. I had a call while i was walking home, and it was my mum. Mum said that MAS just called up and told me to come for a medical check up the next morning. And I was like "huh? tomorrow? wahhh means i have to rush back from melaka to kajang by tonite la?"

And so, i packed my bag as soon as i reached my room, still wondering why MAS didn't inform me a few days or a week earlier. But then, i was very excited and happy at the same time, cos normally those who get called for medical check-up gets a place in! My face was filled with cheer and joy throughout the journey back to Kajang. =) happy =) happy =) happy =) happy

Next morning, woke up at 6am (appointment at 9am), bathed, dressed smartly in long-sleeve and tie, looked non-stop in the mirror to be the perfect most me, drove all the way to Subang Airport, entered the MAS clinic.

Nurse : "Chen Yow Jong!"
Me : "Yes, me. I'm Chen Yow Jong."
Nurse : "Take this cup, put urine inside. Write your name on both the cup and cover."

- me took the cup with a weird feeling, and gave out a really really weird smile. Was i shy? HAHA!
- walked and walked, searching for the toilet.
- found toilet, look left right and behind, see got ppl follow me not.
- went in toilet, closed door.
- started looking above me, checking whether got spy cam or not (hahahah... i know it's funny!)

*** 18 SX ***

Then, i zipped down my zipper..... undressed my sibling with left hand, holding the cup with right hand, and the cup cover between my lips. (that freaking toilet got no place for me to put the stupid cup la!) Then, carefully holding the cup with the right hand, and u know what the left hand was doing, i 'sprayed' into the cup!!!! The cup was around the size of a 'shots cup' - the 1 for liquor. So it wasn't that big, and it filled up really fast mannnnn(with the current flow which was powerful), and i had to stop 'spraying' when it neared full. Now, can u imagine peeing half way and u have to stop and tahan? how does that feel? not easy rite? and the warm chrysanthemum drink splash onto my right hand! (when the cup neared full, sure will splash out rite? just like raining on a puddle of water, it splashes up!)

Oh my God, and i was wearing long-sleeve, remember? i wonder whether i got any chrysanthemum on my BONIA's sleeve. Anyway, then i put the drink on the floor, and continued my release. ahhhh it never felt so good, especially after tahan-ing for 10 seconds and bending down to put the cup.(not easy ok? needs skill) I pick up the cup and saw the chrysanthemum level was quite high, sooo... i poured 0.5cm out. "hmm, better."

Smart-ass me, after coming out from the toilet and walking towards the table full of chrysanthemum cups, i found out that i have not written my name on the paper cup. I took up the pen. Oh b4 that i washed my hands thoroughly with soap and water hehehe... I took up the pen with right hand this time, cup on left hand, and hold the cup high up around eye-level, and wrote my name on the soft surface of the cup, fearing also that chrysanthemum tea might pour on my left hand this time and on the floor and then my shoes and trousers. Thanx to my experience and non-parkinson disease hands, i did a fine job. Btw, the cup felt quite warm.

DONE! everything was done. I washed my hands again, dried it, and out towards the waiting room.
*Wipes sweat... fuhhhh afterall it wasn't that hard.

*to be continued...

Tuesday, April 12

Privileges of MAS staff

One of the best thing about working in the aviation industry is getting cheap air tickets. I'm sure many of you have heard of such things b4? Indeed it's true that we get these great discounts, but it's only applicable to Licence Aircraft Engineers, Pilots, cabin crews and the higher management staff. It doesn't mean that as long as u are working in the airport or under MAS, u'll be getting the privilege. If so, then all cleaners or security guards in the country would be working in the airport then! hahaha...

Besides getting the special rates, i'm eligible for 1 free ticket annually to any part of the world where MAS flights reaches. And the same goes to 3 or 4 direct family members of mine.

The discounted rate goes something like this. However i'm not really sure and cannot confirm the exact percentage, but this is the approximate.

work >5 years - pay only 20%
work >10 years - pay only 15%
work >15 years - pay only 10%

Nothing lower than 10%.

So, let's say after working for 15 years, and i buy a round trip ticket (to and fro) to London, which will cost around RM4000, I would only be paying RM400? Now does that sound good? =P And all my 'direct' family members are eligible of getting this rate. What i mean 'direct' here is my father, mother, and siblings, that's all. NO grandpa grandma uncle auntie cousin. And IF i get married, then only my wife and my kids will get the special rate. hahaha... and therefore my mum has been scolding and warning and lecturing me.

Mum : "i'm telling u, next time u better not marry so early!"
Me : "why la? why suddenly talk about marriage? i dun even have a gf."
Mum : "After u get married, then I won't have free tickets already. Then you only sayang your wife, no more sayang your mother"
Me : "Aiyooo meeee, why u so worried la!"
Mum : "You see auntie Chan(my neighbour), the son only graduated 1 year(he's with MAS too), and after 1 free trip, he got married, auntie Chan so sad and geram."

*falls to the floor and laugh...

My mum my mum.... hahaha! Parents are like that i guess? but i told her not to worry so much, even though i get married, I'll still grant her wish to go anywhere she wants. Any 7 continents of the world also can. She had a smile on her face later on.

HOWEVER there is the cons behind the discounted rate. All tickets purchased with the special rate are standby tickets. Which means the tickets are not confirmed. You have to reach the airport early and tell the check in counter your status. Then, 30 minutes b4 take off, IF AND ONLY IF there's empty seats on the plane, then only i'll be allowed to board the flight. So, this the the major disadvantage.

This case happened to my roommate yesterday. He was in Kota Kinabalu with his family, taking the special rate tickets. So they reached KKIA around 1pm, and requested for standy ticket at the counter. Waited and waited and waited... till 7pm(the last flight, there were many flights between 1-7pm) , still there were no empty seats for them to board the plane. Well, they couldn't do anything, but to wait till today's earliest flight at 5am back to Kuala Lumpur. (they ended up in the airport hotel the whole night)

See.... it's not as good as it seems ya? especially if u have an emergency and need to be punctual. As for the 1 free ticket anually, ahhhh that's a confirmed ticket. hahah just 1 ticket confirmed a year. I guess the reason behind the standby ticket is because passengers pay such high amount for the ticket, so they would rather earn more from them than to rugi to their own staff, haha!

If u have anything u wanna know about aviation, do leave your queries to me.


Monday, April 11

My Hopeless Groupmates...

Hie everyone, it's been a really long time since i last blogged. Have to admit that nothing very much interesting happens in palm oil estates, that's y i have nothing to write about most of the time. In addition with the amount of things that i have to learn about the aircraft electronic systems (which is starting to kill my brain), i'm of no time to blog.

Anyway, just wanna tell u all that my groupmates are hopeless. We formed groups in english class, where this semester we'll be writing essays. Throughout the last 2 months of 6 essays (all needed to be done in a group), I was the one who wrote all 6 essays, all ideas came from meonly, but in the end, the marks were shared among the members. VERY GERAM.

But if i just shut up and act as though some1 will write it in the end (this is what they do), i'm sure we'll be getting very low marks and it will pull down my final exam marks even though i scored 100 during test. And last semester i had to explained continuously to my parents for getting 72 marks for english(they expected better) It's all because of my course works that pulled my bloody results into shit.

Before any presentation starts, i have to write out their scripts, nicely on small pieces of papers, fearing that they might forget what they said. When u asked them whether they are alright and have done their research on the topic so that they would be able to speak more freely and spontaneous, they will give u confident look and say 'YES'. But during the presentation, ................... i just feel like slapping them! I've been doing my best, fighting with all my heart to get the group to a respected status in class, and these bloody mates of mine dun even give a damn and spoil everything. They just go blank during presentation, dun even know what they are talking about. We are not talking about 200 ppl in the lecture hall looking at u, but only 22 ppl including the teacher. sigh.......

They just dun care on any damn thing! I dunno how MAS will survive with these ppl being the aircraft engineers in future, representing the national flag carrier, WHAT A DISGRACE TO THE COUNTRY.

Here's an essay that i just wrote 2 hours ago, free topic.It's another of the group's work, but i did it all by myself. Dunwan to rely on my hopeless mates. I'm not that good in writing, hope u will enjoy it. (this is based on a real life story)





“Four-two-one, you are clear to descend to nine thousand feet.” As the voice of the controller guiding them into the Kuala Lumpur International Airport snapped through his headphones, Captain Anas Akasha entered the new altitude into the automatic pilot but suddenly a red buzzer started blinking and caught his attention. Captain Anas was shocked to see the cabin pressure buzzer blinking and the indicator showed that the pressure was decreasing gradually.

“Captain, did you hear a cracking sound?” said co-pilot Saiful with an anxious look on his face as he snaps on the seat belt. Captain Anas looked around the flight deck filled with control instruments, trying to trace where the crack sound originated from. Before Captain Anas could even reply to Saiful that he acknowledged the cracking sound, the front windscreen of the Captain’s side blew off the aircraft and sucked Captain Anas out from his seat towards the window, leaving the lower half of his body inside and the upper half outside. It happened so fast that Saiful couldn’t believe his eyes. Saiful grabbed Captain Anas’ ankle firmly, preventing the Captain from being sucked out of the aircraft.

To Saiful’s rescue, a cabin crew rushed into the flight deck and grabbed the Captain’s ankle too. “You control the plane, I’ll hold on!” the cabin crew shouted as the wind was so strong that they could hardly hear each other. “Mayday! Mayday! Four-two-one request emergency landing, flight deck malfunction, captain injured!” Those were the words that alerted KLIA’s air traffic controllers at 2132hours and got them up from their seats. “Four-two-one, clear for emergency landing, traffic clear!” replied one of the controller. The other controllers not only alerted all flights in range and put all departures on hold but also alarmed the emergency unit which consist of the medical team, fire brigade team, and the police team to standby for the landing.

Meanwhile, Saiful and the cabin crew holding on to Captain Anas struggled to survive. The Boeing 777 descended from 20,000feet at a speed of 800km/h, blowing head-on wind into the flight deck as cold as -15 degrees centigrade. The 2 of them shivered and tried to prevent hypothermia. Saiful remained calm and focused on the flight control as he put on the oxygen mask for oxygen supplement. In order to keep the furious and panic passengers calm and seated, Saiful did a false announcement through the loud speakers, informing them that it was just a bad weather with a lot of turbulence. It was the best excuse Saiful could think of to prevent from further problems.

However, the heavy and continuous vibrations made the passengers frightened. Children and infants cried and screamed, senior citizens recited prayers, and many other passengers anxiously questioned the cabin crews on the real situation. Following co-pilot Saiful’s order, the cabin crews calmed the passengers with comforting smiles on their face, and told them to be seated with the oxygen mask on and the seat belt bucked up throughout the journey. The cabin crews continued giving assistance and help for those in need and gave encouraging words to reassure them that everything was going to be fine.

After 20 minutes of tense situation, Saiful got a clearance for emergency landing as he approached the runway with just 8 kilometers to go. He was very worried about Captain Anas’ condition, wondering whether he was still alive or suffering a great amount of pain. With Saiful’s experience, the aircraft landed safely and smoothly. All the emergency teams were fully prepared to take over the aircraft and give assistance.

As flight four-two-one came to a halt on the apron, the self-inflated rubber slides launched just after the doors were opened by the cabin crews. The relieved passengers were guided to their exit and they slide down to be accepted by the medical team for check up at a temporary medical booth. Inside the flight deck, both the helpful cabin crew and Saiful were lead out of the aircraft for medical check up too. Saiful was more worried for his Captain than for himself. A few members of the fire brigade team climbed up the electrically operated ladder to the flight deck to check on Captain Anas’ condition. Apparently, Captain Anas was stuck to the windscreen frame. “He’s breathing, Bring me a Doctor!” one of the fireman shouted.

After cutting through the metal frame, Captain Anas was carefully laid on a stretcher for first aid. The Doctor inspected him and confirmed that he was alive, but the captain succumbed fractures on his right arm and wrist, bruises and frostbite. Captain Anas was rushed to the hospital for further care as Saiful looked on from afar, praying hard that the captain will be safe. The Police and engineering investigation team lined up the surroundings of the aircraft and examined the problem. A few investigators also retrieved the black box from the empennage to assist in giving more valuable information that might solve the mystery behind the accident.

Flight four-two-one landed safely with everyone on board alive. It was an unforgettable and challenging flight for Saiful, as well as a traumatic experience by Captain Anas. The news broke the head lines the next day and all flight and cabin crews were awarded the medal of courage for being the hero of the flight.